Unabashedly true prediction #2 for next year:
Yes my friends, I the great zamboni have received this wisdom from the spheres, and despite the fact that it seems senseless; it indeed is rightness.
Brian Wilson, due to his unfortunate injury, will leave the baseball diamond for a year and take his awesome powers of staring people down intimidatingly to war-torn and conflict-ridden lands. Standing between fierce warlords he will switch on his frightening yet mesmerizing stare and like Derek Zoolander’s amazing Magnum look, he will freeze fighters in their tracks, and magically make them peacify with each other.
Could you look into the bearded face and continue your shenanigans? No, and neither will these bad people.
Now you may say, “hey Zamboni, you are three burritos short of a six-pack, you are stepping to the deep end now!” but remember, Obama won the prize himself, and really did nothing except just be cool guy. Well, Brian Wilson even a cooler guy! In Estonia I know a crime king pin who have Brian Wilson’s face tattooed on bottom of his foot, and when I ask why he say, “so when I stomp on my enemy this is the last thing they see, face of greatness”. I found this baffling (is he stomping barefoot?) but did not probe further as this man like to kill.
So there is the truth as as Zamboni see. Of course if his arm gets better faster than expected, consider all this void. Remember, every little thing is connected, and every affect is changed by any little change in the cause.
All the same- stare into those eyes, then try and be heinous – Ha! you cant!