Zamboni, should I do Tarot Cards?

Many people have wondered this, should they believe in things like Tarot, Astronomy, or Dry Cleaning.

I cannot vouch for the last two, but I can say my answer is this: Tarot can be very profound indeed and if the interpreter is good, then I can assure you it is a most very interesting use of your time..In moderation of course and with grains of salt.

But did you know that Zamboni himself  is working on resurrecting a very ancient and prophetically modern Estonian fortune telling deck of cards called The Zamboni Shuffle? Yes it’s true. In this deck (Always stacked against The Devil!) here are some of the cards that come up after you shuffle them and a Licensed Zamboni Card Reader turns them over:

-The Young Sinatra; this card signifies you are lean and hungry and may have to break a mold to succeed.

-Trisha the Goat; this card, named after my childhood playmate, signifies you to get in touch with your playful nature and eat more  vegetables.

-Maria Conchita Alonzo; this card prompts you to either to have a fling with a hot Latina or get in touch with your sassy inner hispanica or both.

Frank_Sinatra_by_Gottlieb_c1947-_2

Knowing me and my intense dedication to leisure, I wouldn’t hold my breath for this deck to be on Amazon tonight- translating from the ancient Estonian is a bitch- but I promise to work as fast as I can and when I am done, private consultations of The Zamboni Shuffle start at only 4,000 Drachmas.

Until then, I offer this advice. Wisdom can come from anywhere, a bearded Tarot reader on Telegraph Ave, a Ted talk, Bazooka wrappers- but the best comes from your own mind, when you think.

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