Today’s question comes from my faithful and slightly frantic reader, “Snow Queen” somewhere in snowbounded New England. Like her, it is somewhat convoluted, passionate, and confusing. But not for me. Here it is:

“I decided to pop on my shiny new Christmas I-pod. You know-it-all Gnomes, I TOO will whistle while I work. A fiesty, young gentleman who goes by the name “slim shady” was yelling in my ear. He seemed a little angry his words were: “You get one shot”….” The opportunity knocks once in a life time” I was struck with sadness. Could it be true these things he says??seems so self assured…. Dear God, did I miss the knock? I knew immediatly this was a question for The Great Zamboni.”

So Snow Queen, you want to know if you missed this knock.

First, I am glad you clear up for me the lyrics of that song. On my Bulgarian bootleg of this small disk, it sounds like he is talking about booze in your shaols, not lose control.. To know more what I’m talking of, I consulted here the internet:

Though this video is fascinating, it seems to be not the song you have mentioned. (The other I could not find, and the donkey powering my 1998 Thinkpad is tiring out so I want to continue) But! Then I say to myself, Zambones, remember what your grandmother from Odessa always used to say, “everything happens for a reason”. Now I realize, this misdirection of failed YouTube search, and my malnourished donkey, leads me your answer!

Do we get only this One Chance in life? Is opportunity like the much longed for Publishers Clearing House knock that comes but once, or even worse, and perhaps this is your real question…maybe never? Or maybe while you are in the shower? I Zamboni, have won this PCH Sweepstakes four times, but I realize this is rare and a result of strange magnetic waves I give off from my home taxidermy workshop.

It is Eminem who answers your question. You want opportunity to knock. Opportunity will not knock. It does not know how to. Look at Eminem. He takes on many personas in this video and in his life. Even in this four minutes he is many people. Why? Because he chooses to be.

You Snow Queen, have it backasswards. Open your door right now, go. Take your fancy ipod with you and open door. You see anything but snow? You see nice golden opportunity? No. Now close door, to save on heat bill.

This Eminem is known in even tiniest village in Estonian Bog. Why? Because he natural talent? Because he look like Rap Star? No. He look like kid you don’t trust hanging out in Walmart parking lot. He make to the top from passion, hard  work and taking chance. Thats it. And even when he screw things up, he make second chance by hugging Elton John at Grammies.

So if someone knock on your door, and you say, “who is it?” And they reply, “oh, hellooo, I am wonderful opportunity..open uup, smily smiley…” Call 911 immediately or get rifle, because they may be sexual predator or Jehovas Witness.

Then sit down, lose yourself in dreams, come back, write down what you want to happen, yell from moving car window,  knock on your own head, and then:

DO. Like a rat without a tail, do and do and do.

It just make dramatic song lyrics to say it knock once. It knock as many times as you like.

But will you take?

Yes. I think you will.